Tuesday, November 11, 2014

My current well-being and a glimmer of hope for the future.

This is going to be a long post so just bear with me. I need to get this all out.

As I sit here on my bed at almost 3:00 am listening to a nonstop-mix of DDR 5th Mix (I've had a lot of coffee tonight), so many thoughts are running through my mind.

Not that this is anything new. The channels are constantly flipping in my head all the time with many images, fantasies, people, etc. The thing is I never considered this to be such a nuisance....until now.

I've realized the older I've been getting, the more my mind has become increasingly disorganized to the point that the mess that is going on in my head has seemed to manifest itself in real life. I look around my family's house and even though I've seen way worse messes in other friend's places, it's getting to the point where if it doesn't get picked up now,  it's going to keep piling up and my family and I will just take glimpses at it and say to ourselves 'Oh, look. The house is a mess. I'm so tired though. I'll take care of it later.'

This kind of behavior has been a festering problem in our live for quite some time, especially on my end, as of late. It's not even just about the physical state of my current residence that has been the only negative thing. I feel like I have been going through some drastic changes in my personality and lifestyle that are both good and bad, but at the same time I have been dealing with some personal demons since mid-2014 after I decided to move back in  with my folks after living with some roommates who are close friends for about five to six months.

The decision wasn't an easy one and it wasn't due to friction with my roommates. I wanted to move back in with my parents to save a bit more money to travel, buy a new car and a computer. I was paying a little over $600 for rent and electricity before I moved back which was actually not that much considering how expensive it is to live here in California.

Needles to say, I am now regretting that decision.

The negativity that has always been present in my life has gotten out of control and is getting worse by the day. For those of you who know me and my family, you know what the source of it is without having to think about it. In any case, the negative vibes in my household has dragged me down so much that I feel unmotivated, irritable, depressed (at times), angry and sad. It's always a relief when I can get out of the house for work or to hang out with friends to get away from the troubles at home. That's why I moved out in the first place: to start a new chapter in my life with new found freedom on my own.

But now I've realized that by distracting myself and then coming back to even worse negativity than before, I'm not only running away from my problems that need to be resolved, but I am also taking it with me unconsciously when I'm elsewhere other than the house. In turn, I feel like have been less open with my feelings and emotions towards people who matter. I feel like not only have I disconnected with my closest friends, but with myself as well. Everything that I used to be passionate about such as writing, playing video games for fun, reading and other things now just feel like another chore I don't want to deal with. Time and luck has not been kind to me recently, but I feel like that's more my fault than anything else

I feel like I have regressed a bit in my lifestyle and this shouldn't be happening at my age. I'm 31 years old with Bachelor of Science in Journalism that hasn't been put to valuable use yet and I'm still living with my folks. Don't get me wrong. I don't dislike my parents (well with the exception of one), but recently between my mom's current health situation, car problems, my erratic work schedule and other minor things that have added up in my life the past few weeks, it's been very difficult to remain positive and strong for so long. I've been putting things off and it has been overwhelming me where I feel like I'm drowning in an ocean of negative feelings. I haven't had anytime to absorb and reflect upon everything that has been happening until now.

However, not everything is so gloomy. The past few weeks has been a huge wake up call for me with all the bad luck that has been hovering over me recently. I am starting to see things much clearer now and that's what has been helping me cope with all these stressful situations that life has thrown my way. I actually sat down and typed a list of thing I want to do for the rest of 2014, 2015 and beyond. Call it my early New Year's Resolution bucket list. I talk about everything. Just the most important ones.

First and foremost, I have to get a new car. My white 1995 Buick Skylark overheated recently along with a slew of other problems that popped up shortly afterwards. I'm tired of putting money into an old car that's on it's last legs so I'm going to start looking for a Mazda or Nissan model at a price range I can afford. Secondly, I want to make an appointment for acquiring my passport. I've been wanting to travel overseas for so long now, but I keep being lazy about it. I'm planning on going on a trip to South Korea with one of my closest friends, Bonnie Baythavong from Texas (whose wedding I'm planning on attending) hopefully after next summer so getting that passport is a must. Thirdly, I want to start looking for a writing position that pays well; maybe something in the way of technical writing or a position as a columnist, reviewer or critic in gaming, music, movies and TV.

Speaking of gaming, like I said a few paragraphs ago, I feel like I have lost my passion for some of the things I enjoy in my life and gaming has been a big part of who I have become. I have accumulated a large library of games that I haven't even beaten or haven't played at all yet. I'm going to try and make more time to get back in touch with one of the things that has not only helped me grow as a competitive player, but as a person as well. I'll still be training and competing in games such as Ultra Street Fighter IV, Third Strike and the upcoming Super Smash Bros Wii U, but I will be making sure I don't lose sight of the fun factor and joy it breathes into my life.

Other things on my list of goals is to be better about saving up more money for essential necessities in my life such as the ones mentioned above as well for when I can find an affordable place to live one of these days again, Some concerts and events I want to attend (Wrestlemania 31, Nightwish, Freestyle Explosion, major gaming tournaments, etc), cleaning and organizing the house back to the way it used to be, writing more on a daily basis, educate myself through internet and library research on other important subjects I don't know a lot about and to start video blogging.

Last, but not least, I want to get back in touch and spend more time with the people who matter in my life; namely my family, my sister's husband's family and my closest friends who I have feel like I have distanced myself from both knowingly and unknowingly and for that I apologize. I just felt like I had to in order to focus on myself and do some deep soul-searching on where I'm headed for the rest of my life. Once again, I apologize to those I may or may not have hurt because of my non-responsive actions. I care about others deeply which I felt like has been both a blessing and a curse for the longest time. Recent events that have unfolded in my life  has caused me to lose trust in people. Also I have become "friends" with too many people both online and offline that are more like acquaintances so I have decided I'm going to cut those people out who aren't really there for me when I need them the most or just ones who I rarely ever see. That doesn't include those live out of state or overseas since I keep in regular contact with them at events or online.

This has been a difficult process to  reconnect, regroup and start a new chapter in my life that has gone awry for a while now with myself and others. I don't know what lies ahead in my future, but I'm going to make the most of it from here on out. I know I've preached the same mantra over and over again with some of you, but from now on my actions will speak very loudly this time. Less thinking,  more doing and more happiness will be the theme for the rest of my life's story. One can only hope that I don't fall off the train this time.

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

My EVO 2014 Performance

This year was my fifth time competing at Evolution in the Street Fighter IV series and my first time competing at the event as a sponsored player under Macro Micro Gaming.

I've done fairly well at EVO usually making it out of my pools and winning matches against competent, unknown and well-known players. However, I always come up short just outside of top 32 every time. I made it a point to end that curse this time around, but with close to 2,000 players competing in Ultra Street Fighter IV this year, this was easier said than done.

The first opponent in my pool was none other than Carl White a.k.a. FNATIC l Perfect Legend, a well-known top player in Mortal Kombat and Injustice: Gods Among Us. He is also an accomplished Street Fighter IV player since the original entry came out back in 2009 as one of the first recognizable Akuma players for the first couple of years in the series. He has since then switched to Yun which I was more than ready for since my teammate, Julio Fuentes, is one of the best Yun players in the states whom I play against on a weekly basis.

With my matchup experience against Yun embedded into my head, I took down Perfect Legend 2-0 to advance in my pool. He did get some rounds off of me in each match, but I stuck to my game plan of punishing his air-airs, lack of proper defense and his overall reckless play-style to win the set.

My second match was against someone named Edo.  I don’t remember who he played as or how the match went other than I quickly beat him 2-0. 

What I do vividly remember is my third match against Sanford Kelly, one of the top east coast players from the state of New York with one of the best Sagats in the world.

Our bout was intense and down to the wire from beginning to end.  I was on match point in the second and third match, but I couldn’t close it out due mostly to execution errors and not teching a few key throws. I barely lost 2-1 and was sent to losers in the third round of my pool. I wasn’t too upset about it since it was such a close set against one of the best players in the states who regularly plays against PIE l Zeus, one of the top east coast Vega players.

The tournament nerves got the best of me in that match, but my narrow loss strangely gave me some more confidence against the rest of the players in my pool. The last three players in my pool were Sang Le (C. Viper), Ed l Justinxavier (Juri) and Sean Seal (Balrog). I defeated all three players 2-0 in succession to make it out of my pool in the losers bracket. I made it to the quarter finals.

Sadly, my first match in quarter finals was my last as I fell to Kentaro Nakamura a.k.a. “Misse,” one of the best Makoto players from Japan. I had played against him in casuals the day before, but I didn’t have a concrete grasp of his play-style with Makoto. When I played him in the tournament, he quickly defeated me 2-0 with his surprisingly conservative strategy of building meter in the corner and carefully picking his spots to rush in to dizzy me with two combos quickly draining my life bar.
I was eliminated from EVO 2014 tying for top 256 out of nearly 2,000 competitors.

The rest of the weekend I played casuals and money matches against many players such as Rom, Ranmasama, Alex Valle, Joe Shyne, SRKUW l Fawwaz, Tinshi, NGL l Brentt, Misse, Acqua, Velociraptor, UTJ, RPD l Alex Smith, Thrillhouse and many others. I wish I could have done better at EVO 2014, but I don’t feel like I played terrible in retrospect. This was arguably the toughest EVO to date with the most entrants in its history and there were many great players who placed the same as I did or lower.

In any case, I had an amazing time at EVO once again. It was a great learning experience and I am determined to train harder again for next year.

Thursday, September 26, 2013

To the newlyweds, Mimi and Ronnie Sarti

For those of you who don't know me, my names is Marcos and I am Michelle's "big" brother. I know I don't look much older than the bride, groom, the bridesmaids or groomsmen, but trust me I'm a fairly old man compared to these naive whippersnappers. Just kidding of course....sort of.

First of all, I would like to thank everyone for coming to Michelle and Ronnie’s wedding on this joyous day. Please give the newlyweds a big round of applause.

When I first met Ronnie, he reminded me of someone famous I’ve seen in several films. I mean, is it just me or doesn’t he look like a certain celebrity stud whose name rhymes with Colorado Broom? Just look at that stache! It reeks of Will Turner! But it’s ok. I can tolerate his elfish good looks since he plays Call of Duty and Skyrim on a regular basis. That and Michelle can tolerate it since she has watched me play video games since she was a newborn baby.

Seriously though, I couldn’t think of a better person than Ronnie as Michelle’s other half.  I accepted you right off the bat when I first met you. Your cool, calm and collected nature compliments my sister’s vicious, short-tempered, doesn’t know when to shut up attitude. He also makes both her and our parents laugh which is a plus in my book.

Ronnie, I am extremely happy to call you my brother-in-law. Welcome to our crazy family. Just please don't change your mind and take up an acting career. You are fine the way you are.

Michelle. Oh, Michelle.

My baby demon princess of a sister whom I personally named after Michelle Pfieffer. Where do I begin with you?

From the moment I held you in my arms when you were born on April 23, 1992, I knew you were something special. Special in the sense that you were going to be one tough cookie to deal with as you grew up alongside your big bro.

I mean from haphazardly running around all over the place yelling and screaming at our parents because you didn't get your way or kicking, scratching and biting me for no reason only for your personal sick enjoyment, you never ceased to amaze and frustrate us with your rebellious antics from when you were three years old up until.....well right now actually.

Despite your rough behavior throughout all the years, however, I have always admired and sometimes was jealous of your positive qualities that I wish I could have exhibited when I was younger.
You were  bold, fearless and were never afraid to speak your mind. You are very stubborn and full of pride, but you always stuck to your guns no matter what and you never changed for anyone but yourself. You still embody all these qualities to this day and that's not a bad thing.

Through both your strengths, weaknesses and experiences throughout your life, you have grown into a fine, young woman. You are kind, caring, loyal and you always stand up not only for own beliefs and morals, but for your friends and family as well. You have inspired me to not only to become a good brother, but a better person than I could have ever imagined. I don't know if I was there for you as much as I should have been as your big brother, but I know you have always have and continue to be there for me when I'm feeling down and out and for that I am eternally grateful.

You've been through tough times up to this point, but you have come out of those tumultuous moments a stronger person than I or anyone else could ever hope to be. I am so proud of you and what you have transformed into. I love you so much and now I am happy to call you my baby demon queen of a sister!
Congrats to both you and Ronnie on this blessed day. All of us who are here today, including Mama, who is watching from up above and smiling down on the two of you, wish you both nothing but everlasting happiness and unforgettable memories in the years to come in this brand new chapter in your lives. Cheers!

Friday, June 21, 2013

Assumptions and Judgement: I don't like it.

I usually don't post stuff like this, but I have to get it out since I don't like bottling things up.

One of my pet peeves: people assuming things about me when they don't even ask me personally. It truly offends me because I feel like they haven't even taken the time to get to know me before making that assumption. I feel like I'm being judged and I really don't need that at this point in my life. You either love me or hate me and that's that.

If you are a friend or an acquaintance of mine who I see on a regular basis and you are on my Facebook or Twitter, please if you have something to say about me, don't be afraid to chat it up. YOU added or accepted me for a reason, right? I put in the effort to socialize with via a call, text, chat room, a post, etc. I expect a response back. If you are too busy to respond, just let me know with a simple "I have to go," I'm busy at the moment," or "I'll talk to you later." It's not that hard, folks.

I can't promise I won't get angry, sad or happy, but there's always going to be pain and suffering for both parties involved. So don't do further damage to someone's character by keeping it to yourself or telling someone else. if you have a problem with me or you find something questionable regarding my being, please let me know. I'm not a mind reader and I'm still learning a lot about myself just like everyone else on this planet.

Then again, maybe I'm the one making the assumptions and I just don't realize it. In any case, this should apply to everyone and their relationships with friends and family. It makes dealing with life's other aspects a whole lot easier when issues like the ones I just mentioned are discussed, dissected and becomes water under the bridge towards building a less stressful and drama-free future.

Oh, and if I'm doing the same thing, I apologize in advance for any pain I might have caused. Please call me on it face-to-face before it blows up out of proportion. I don't like hurting people unintentionally without my knowing.

That's my rant for tonight. Hopefully my next post will be a lot more positive and cheerful than this one.

Friday, January 4, 2013

MGL VERSUS: Weekly SSFIV: AE 2012 Results and preparation for SoCal Regionals

Hello, folks. Last night we had a quite a few people show up at Milpitas Golfland for a decent sized SSFIV: AE 2012 session and tournament.

SSIV: AE 2012 Top 8 (25 entrants)

1. Kelvin "Mak Daddy" Jeon (Makoto)
2. Kimo Pamintuan (Hakan)
3. Haaris Abbasi (Ryu)
4. Marcos "El Cubano Loco" Blanco (Claw)
5. Geoffrey "Uuyupop" Yoon (Guy)
5. Rocky (Cody)
7. Julio Fuentes (Yun)
7. Brian "BJ" Jeon (Cody)

Kelvin has been on fire as of late with his patented Makoto play earning his second straight tournament victory. Kimo tore through the brackets and had a reset in grand finals against Kelvin which made for a hype finale; earning him a much deserved second place finish. Both players have shown with hard work, determination and showing very little emotion that they have what it takes to make it to the top.

I ended up getting fourth place as you can see from the above results which is ok. I ended up losing Kelvin in   a close set (2-1) and got destroyed by Haaris' old-school Ryu gameplay (2-0). Haaris did a weird ambiguous setup on me which made me block the right way and blew up my crouch tech with an EX Tatsu after catching my bad jump-in when I had the lead with j.mp>U1. It got into my head which made me not want to crouch tech in the subsequent rounds and he blew me up with throws which garnered him a 2-0 victory over me. I've beaten him many times in the past, but this was his first time beating me convincingly as well as against Geoffrey's Guy.

Needles to say, I was not pleased.

Now, Socal Regionals in Irvine, CA is coming up two weeks from today. I wanted to attend the past three, but couldn't because of work and lack of funds at the time. Not the case this year thankfully. I'll be attending SoCal Regionals with Khiry "Kurokiba" Crawford, my bud Cisco Resendes and possibly some other people who will room with us.

I've been trying to get in as much practice as I can for this event with the best players here in Norcal. I feel like I have something to prove when I participate in this event since I consider SoCal to have the best players when it comes to fighting games. My goal is to at least make top 32 or top 16 and work from there. I have been trying to get as many sessions and spend time in training mode as much as possible all while working full time at the same time. It's difficult, but hopefully I should do well once SCR rolls around.

And not just me. I want everyone from NorCal who is going to this event to step their game up and do well at this event. We've always had a huge rivalry with SoCal and they are usually the better players. With that being said, I have that we have the stronger player base as of late when it come to both AE 2012 and UMVC3. Let's go and show SoCal we are not free!

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

My SSFIV: AE 2012 Tier List and my personal worst Claw match-ups

Hello, everyone. Here's my AE 2012 tier list. Thanks to Nacer for the inspiration to write a short post about this.

S: Cammy, Adon, Fei Long
A: Akuma, Ryu, Seth, C. Viper, Yun, Sakura
B: Rufus, Zangief, Makoto, Ibuki, Claw, Dictator, Boxer, Sagat, Ken, Honda, Cody, Abel
C: Gen, Guy, Yang, Rose, Gouken, Dhalsim, Blanka, Guile, Oni, E. Ryu, Chun-Li, El Fuerte, Juri
D: Dee Jay, Dudley, Hakan, T. Hawk, Dan

Personally, I feel my worst match-ups are definitely Cammy, Gen, Akuma and Honda. I also feel like sometimes a really good Guile or Dictator player beats Claw a lot as well, although I think they are mostly even compared to the top four I just mentioned.

I have seem to hit a wall against Cammy and Gen with Claw so I might start counter-picking with Dictator. He was my secondary in Vanilla SFIV and lately I have been playing him in training mode, in casuals and at a couple of the local tournaments as of late. My confidence in playing Dic is getting better by the day so hopefully I can bust him out more often if my Claw isn't doing so well on certain dasy or in certain character or player match-ups I have trouble with.

I'll still be mostly playing with Claw since I'm the most comfortable with him in almost every match-up. There is still room for improvement with my Claw play as well.

Monday, October 8, 2012

Play Hard

Hello, folks! Back again for another blog post!

So......I've been on a good high on life as of late. Been going out more often than usual due to the sheer amount of birthdays and house parties that have been popping up around the Bay Area since last month and continuing into this crazy month of October. I'll be going to my record seventh b-day bash tomorrow night at my co-worker Cisco's place in Santa Clara which should be a blast with plenty of booze and gaming to satisfy everyone.

Hmmm...sounds a lot like this past weekend....

Anyway, in other awesome news, I got second place overall in the fifth season of the Southtown Arcade Ranbats for Super Street Fighter IV: Arcade Edition 2012. First place went to Harrison Young of Starbase Arcade fame with his strong Cody play and third went to my good friend and rival, Long "LPN" Nguyen playing mostly with Cammy and Adon throughout the entire season.http://www.southtownarcade.com/archives/684

This is the highest I've ever placed in a ranbat season so I'm extremely happy with this accomplishment. Two of the tournaments I went to in San Francisco I would lose my first match only to run it all the way back through losers to either get second or third which was no easy feat. I learned more about spacing, positioning and playing under pressure more so than any other ranbat I've attended.

Oh, and I got first place for the first time at the last Southtown Ranbat of the season which was the start of my recent high on life and it hasn't stopped. Hopefully I can finally win my first Thursday Night Throwdown later this week. It would be a huge confidence booster going into the Street Fighter 25th Anniversary Qualifier in L.A. next weekend. I will be competing in both Street Fighter 3: Third Strike and AE 2012 so wish me luck on my training and success. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cx_p5P_twwQ